coffeelemental

It’s a hell of a thing being an artist. On the one hand, you get to view the world in what is essentially high-definition. You notice all the weird little details in your environment, like the way the light hits that spiderweb in the distant corner. You notice all the brilliant little idiosyncrasies that give your fellow humans personality, the way they can express themselves in the most subtle ways. But on the other, if you try to replicate the world as you see it so that others can share in your joy, it can be a…process. The hand won’t necessarily put out what you can see so clearly with your eyes or in your mind. And worst of all…it’s hard not to tie your identity in somehow to the work you produce. In general, I wouldn’t recommend it. :P The idea of artistic identity is something I’ve been struggling with a lot with over the past year. It’s something that’s lurked at the back of my head for a while, but my life going tits-up back in the fall of 2020 really brought it to the fore

Personal confession: it’s hard to write these updates sometimes. I get caught in this spiral of “they’re probably mad at me” -> put it off because I think they’re mad at me -> “they’re definitely mad now because I put it off.” So here I am at the “force it out before they all leave” stage of my mental spiral. (And I’m still on the “avoid checking my various inboxes so I don’t see something depressing and lose all motivation” part.) I’m still here! I’m still alive. Life is proceeding at…a very muddy pace. How dare I formerly live in a country that isn’t the US, I guess. My current bugbear is having to re-take the drivers exam – yes, both of them – even though I’ve been safely driving for over half my life. Why? Because Ontario’s not a real place apparently (and to be fair, I had my doubts about that even while living there). In the meanwhile I plug away at the Anomaly as best I can. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve restarted this project. I’ve really struggled with it (apart